Fug or Fine: Taylor Swift, With Bonus Fug


I had an epiphany while looking at this photo that Taylor Swift right now is the blonde Carly Rae Jepsen. Or, rather, CRJ is the brunette Taylor Swift.

But you feel me: Heavy bangs into her eyes, very bright mouth, both working together to obliterate their eyes and other facial features so that all you see is Fringehead McLippy. It’s not as distracting on Taylor as it is on CRJ, though, so she has that going for her. What of the dress? Well, I wouldn’t hate it, except for the giant darts making boob dimples. The one on the left is so deep you could do a shot from it.

What she wore for her performance, though, took the cake. And then stepped on it.

Pardon me for this, but I cannot resist: She and those shorts should never, ever get back together. Like, EVER.

Too harsh?

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[Photos: Getty]

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Comments (60):

  1. Stefanie
    0

    She does love a high waisted short. And I cant for the life of me figure out why.

  2. Laura
    0

    At least her mouth is closed. I do like the dress. The shorts? No.

  3. Natasha Cher
    0

    Black and white: is she promoting Sephora?

    • Karen G
      0

      I couldn’t swear to it, but it looks like a Kate Spade to me.

      • Orange Clouds
        0

        That dress actually made me more think of Dr Seuss.

        • Rayna
          0

          Orange Clouds – ME TOO!!!

          The shorts are made of no, but that “ruby” top is made of YES!

          Imagine it with a respectable black skirt.

      • Cucina49
        0

        The dress is Kate Spade. I looked at it for a hot second in a store this weekend and decided I was way too old (and not twee enough) to wear it. It’s very cute, though.

  4. Lily
    0

    Did she at some point rip off those shorts to reveal that that ‘top’ is actually a dress? There is some weird bulge around her pelvis.

  5. lor
    0

    She wore a variant of this when she sang on Dancing With the Stars. Stripped her of every curve she had – very sad.

    You can do better, T.Swift!

  6. mue
    0

    Swift is long-waisted, or seems long-waisted. It’s not a feature to accentuate.

  7. Squirrel!
    0

    Are we voting on the dress or the performance outfit?

  8. margaret
    0

    I agree–fail. I’m also disturbed by her red microphone which suggests a knife she is dangerously close to pushing towards her nostril.

  9. Chelsea
    0

    I think the outfit would have worked had the shorts been much shorter, á la a Britney Spears performance outfit. Then she’d look jazzy, and it would make sense.

  10. pantsonfire
    0

    You know, she gets a lot of (probably justified) criticism for her bland color palate, but I think the thing that really bugs me about her style is its unrelenting ladylikeness. And I get it–not every girl likes androgyny or edge or a little rock ‘n roll. Totally fine. But it’s just ladylike outfit after ladylike outfit with her prim poses and precise hair and makeup. I know, many citizens of Fug Nation are just relieved not to be confronted with see-through this and lacy sheer that, so will not understand this bemoaning of a ladylike style. It’s just on Taylor Swift it feels so artful and purposeful and self-satisfied, maybe?

    • KateShouldbeWorking
      0

      I think you nailed it with “self-satisfied”. I’d do you one further and go to “smug”.

    • Billie
      0

      I agree whole heartedly! I guess what bothers me about the whole ‘prim’ persona is the fact that every hit she’s had is written after a different ex-boyfriend. How many freaking exes do you have? You cannot be that prim if you’ve dated half of Hollywood … then none of them wanted to stay with you.

      • Daffodil
        0

        THIS. And it’s also exactly why she reminds me of this smug, holier-than-thou roommate I had in college, with whom I had to stop being friends because I realized it was all about me being HER friend, not at all about her being MY friend.

        Also, as someone who was TSwift’s age in the mid-90s and therefore spent those Hot Body Without Even Trying years wearing sweatpants and flannel shirts and mom jeans — PLEASE STOP. Just wear things regular 20-year-old girls wear. Show off the curves. Save prim for when you’re somebody’s mom.

        • Sajorina
          0

          Excuse me, Billie, she hasn’t dated half of Hollywood! She’s like any other girl in her early 20s… She dates! And, who says they guys are leaving her? Maybe she just gets out once she realizes the relationship isn’t going anywhere! And, if that’s the case, I think it’s commendable for someone her age, an age in which so many women stay in bad relationships because they’re not mature or strong enough to leave when they should! You don’t know her life!

    • Megan
      0

      That’s how I see it, too – it’s very deliberate and comes across as…artificial, maybe? Like she’d rather wear ripped jeans and a fun top, but someone told her to wear these outfits instead.

  11. ringthing
    0

    Yuck, it’s all fug. That first dress is so infantile for TS that it makes me stabby. It would look great on Kiernan Shipka if it’s not too infantile even for her.

  12. Remi
    0

    I feel those shoes on the second picture need a shoutout as well, it finishes the outfit so…hmm…brilliantly?

  13. jjdaddyo
    0

    TS’ sensibility is from 1957. That’s why both these outfits would be better with bullet bras.

  14. sadie-ann
    0

    I like her first dress, but on her it makes me do this ‘again, really?’ sort of sigh. I swear that this sort of dress and lip are just her version of throwing on jeans and t-shirt. It’s what you put on when you don’t want to put thought into it.

  15. Sandra
    0

    Can the FugNational Anthem be “Blame Stella”? To the tune of “Blame Canada”, obviously. Yeah, McCartney probably had nothing to do with this, but it’s such convenient shorthand for “ohgodnoMYEYES!!”

  16. Lex
    0

    The dress and overall outfit in the first picture is nothing short of beautiful.

    Fug Girls, you are much more picky/pedantic/harsh with Taylor than with anyone else. Was this on the Kruger or…I dunno, someone like that, you would see the beautiful, simple yet bold, dress with well-matched black shoes, neatly coiffed, very clean looking, pretty hair and give it a resounding “Fab”. With Taylor: nitpicking about an unfortunate side effect of darts in silk/satin fabric that can’t be avoided except by the superhuman?
    Christ.

    As to comments from readers here…

    She looks beautiful, taste/opinion aside.
    She is beautiful, perfection/superhuman-ness/none-of-us-is-a-supreme-being-of-perfection aside.
    The dress is beautiful, if not to everybody’s taste, of course.

    Girls can/do/often have done/historically always did/are allowed to/etc wear dresses so I can’t fathom the logic behind the “really bugs me about her style is its unrelenting ladylikeness”-type comments.
    (The author of that comment above first states that she completely accepts that Taylor can have the style she has and that she does not have to be rocky/edgy etc., and then proceeds to contradict that statement with what I’ve quoted above, showing that she in fact does NOT accept that Taylor can dress/act/be however and whoever she wants, except in the case that she ONLY DOES IT SOMETIMES.

    God forbid a girl dress exactly how she likes, all the time. We only want girls/women to feel good and comfortable SOME of the time. Much better than way…right?
    Apropos of this, Taylor has explicitly stated in more than one interview that she prefers to wear dresses and skirts most/all of the time, as she likes the way they make her feel.

    As for comments that ascribe emotions/motivations on to Taylor Swift for which there is not a scrap of evidence (things like her being smug/self-satisfied etc): someone who has studied human behaviour might say that when we do that to someone we don’t actually know personally, we are projecting on to them qualities we need them to have in order to find a fault in someone we perceive to be too close to perfection for comfort. I AM NOT, I repeat: I AM NOT saying Taylor is closer to perfection than any of us. I AM saying that some of us might perceive it that way, SUBCONSCIOUSLY, since she possesses many of the qualities/material possessions/life experiences that a lot of us want/have wanted/used to want as kids or teens etc.

    Before you figuratively jump all over me for being an irritating little knobhead (which I am, really, most of the time, but that does not detract from the cogency of the points I’ve made), have a proper think. Ciao.

    • Christine
      0

      I completely agree with you Lex, thanks for laying it out much better than i ever could. It doesn’t come across as fake at all to me, it comes across as genuinely her style and who she is – and I adore her for it. The LAST thing we need is another Vag-flashing hooker-like pop star. I think Taylor stands out from the crowd and I appreciate her for it.

      • Guerra
        0

        I agree lex!

        • GFY Heather
          0

          If that dress were on Diane Kruger I can assure you I would have the same problems with the boob darts. I don’t give people passes — I am pretty much the only person, including Jess, who is sick of Helena Nonham Carter looking expensively homeless.

    • Aphy
      0

      So you’re saying we’re jealous? Um, no I’m not not in the least. This is a site that critiques outfits. It’s what we are doing. There are far more beautiful women that have been shown on GFY that have been praised and rightfully so.

      I hate the high waisted shorts. I hate the stupid red shoes. I would love the first dress if it weren’t for the darts.

      Not even subconsciously would I have ever wanted to be this young lady or date John Mayer (shudder).

      • Sajorina
        0

        Well, @Billie up there criticized & judged Taylor for dating “half of Hollywood”! I ask you, what does THAT have to do with her outfits?!

    • pantsonfire
      0

      Whoa. There’s a lot there. What I said was that we have different tastes, and I accept that Taylor Swift gravitates toward the fifties style of ultra-done, ultra polished, very consciously ladylike, HOWEVER, I do not like that it is “unrelenting.” It feels monotonous to me. The second point I made is that it comes across as inauthentic because it feels so overworked and so full of effort. Sure, ladylike reads authentic on some women, but it just doesn’t seem that way to me with respect to Ms. Swift–at least not to the degree she does it–it feels costumey. But to each her own! Your comment reads like a defense against a personal attack. This is just a fun fashion criticism site, not a brief I’m submitting to district court. We’re all here to have fun!

      • Jessica
        0

        Yes, we can all agree to disagree sometimes. It really all is in good fun.

        I respectfully disagree that we are meaner to Taylor than we are to anyone else; I think everyone gets it on here, sometimes. If you look at her archives, she has A LOT of Well Playeds, including very recently. She hasn’t been outright fugged hardly at all.

    • Vandalfan
      0

      TL, DR, Lex.
      She’s a porcelain doll, a pageant toddler. She always looks polished and on display. And always “perfect”.

      The black and white dress would look better with even stripes- the one at her waist is too thin. The performance shorts don’t hurt my feelings too much, but the blouse looks like a skin condition.

    • Tia Chocolate
      0

      I love my GFY, but I have to wholeheartedly agree with Lex on this one. Everyone screams and rants about sheer/half-naked/drunken/druggie/cheap-ho-like starlets and their behavior and here is a young lady who, while in the public eye, is dating and finding herself, and seems to have a style that is her own, and may not work all the time, but by god, is HER style, we rip into it and project (yes, PROJECT) these ideas about what we *think* she is actually thinking/doing/feeling. Good god people what *do* you want? Why judge and nitpick on someone who has the good sense not to flash her nips/vag at us on a random Tuesday?
      I have heard maybe three of her songs and liked it, and I’ll be honest, by the time I hit 22 I had dated over 36 men in a 4 year span…I certainly would not be casting stones on this young lady for her ‘dating’ life. Considering what I did, she’s positively nun-like.
      #rant.over

  17. val.
    0

    Swift is so tall and thin that she can almost pull off those shorts. I don’t think they are super flattering, but they aren’t horrible, either. I’ve seen far worse on this site!

  18. holly
    0

    If you threw this dress on Lindsay Lohan y’all would be like “FINALLY girlfriend looks presentable!” but on somebody who generally looks great all the time it’s boring and predictable? This is an impossible game to win, ladies.

    • pantsonfire
      0

      Bestill my heart! I would love to see this on Lohan–with the red hair, that could give off the classic fifties flame-haired vixen/vamp. Now THAT could be interesting. Such great ideas on this site…

      • Helen
        0

        I like the dress fine on Taylor but agree it could be terrific on Lohan.

    • SKS
      0

      But the “grading” is always curved.

      With Lindsay Lohan, it would be like “OMG she bathed and found a dress that doesn’t unnecessarily expose anything!”. Even then, it really depends on how she showed up. There’s always a chance her makeup ends up being a hot mess. Or she shows up out of it for whatever reason.

      With Taylor, I honestly don’t think this dress is that bad. It’s alright. The breast darting is noticeable — actually, it’s quite obvious, because it’s on lighter-coloured fabric. If it was on a black stripe, it wouldn’t be so bad.

      There’s someone like Dita von Teese, who has a shtick, but she works it and she still takes risks here and there.

      I think basically what I’m saying is fashion is subjective, and people will always have opinions, and their opinions will be coloured by what they think of the person. :P

      • GFY Heather
        0

        Again… No matter who it was, I would have commented on the boob darts. It was my only issue with the dress. Please do not confuse other commenters’ opinions with what I wrote!

        • SKS
          0

          I tried to communicate that the darting was obvious on anyone; I’m sorry if it didn’t come across that way. :(

        • ChaChaHeels
          0

          If the boob darts would have been less visible on a black stripe, then the dress fails as well. Cutting fabric for a garment has to be done a specific way in order for that garment to fit well, look like it was properly made, and flatter the body. It’s like cutting plaid or patterned material–no one wants to make a garment where the plaids don’t meet visually at the seams because it will look cheaply made and it won’t fit well because the fabric won’t drape properly. if you’re going to cut a striped fabric so that your boob darts will fall on a white background and end up looking like weird flaws, you’ve done it wrong. That’s a legitimate critique on the dress–that there’s a big error in its design.

  19. Em
    0

    When I read the Carly Rae Jepson thing, I actually gasped out loud. I have been trying to work out who Carly reminded me of for bloody ages

  20. Helen
    0

    The first outfit is okay with me. True, for Swift it’s same-old, same-old, but it’s a defined, put-together look, and it fits well. You can just about always count on her to have things properly tailored. The boob darts don’t bother me (and in most shots retrieved by Googling her name and the event, they’re really not noticeable).

    That stage outfit, on the other hand… WHAT. NO. GO TO YOUR ROOM, YOUNG LADY. And don’t come out until you’re ready to wear – something else. Almost anything else. Then give this to Fergie.

  21. anonymoose
    0

    She’s no Ann-Margret.

  22. Alice
    0

    I’m just so bored of everything she wears. Holly, you’re right, if this was on Lohan everyone would be excited, because it’s not something she normally wears, and probably would look fantastic. On Taylor Swift, it looks good (she really can’t look bad, she’s a beautiful girl), but it looks like everything else she’s worn in the past year. I appreciate having a sense of personal style, but that doesn’t mean that everything you wear has to be exactly like everything else you wear. I would have loved that dress on her if it had been even slightly different – like, say, instead of being black and white, it could have been black OR white and a color (I’m envisioning a bright emerald green). It doesn’t mean she should change her whole style just for the sake of taking risks if she doesn’t want to, but interjecting something slightly different would be a breath of fresh air.

  23. Alice
    0

    Also, those shorts make her look pregnant, which for someone who’s not pregnant is never ideal. Love the top she’s wearing with them though!

  24. The Fugger
    0

    But wait, this completely conflicts with my theory that CRJ is secretly Zooey Deschanel.

    Or wait. Taylor Swift could be CRJ could be Zooey D. (Think about it – have you ever seen any of them in the same place at once?)

    As for the dress: La Lohan would look fug in it. At least IMO – then again, I’m just not wild about Linds in strapless stuff right now.

  25. sadie-ann
    0

    Maybe CRJ and Taylor are secretly having a hair battle. Biggest bangs win.

    CRJ, is currently winning I think because I saw her on a Cosmo cover and my first thought was ‘her hair is eating her face’.

  26. Sara
    0

    I don’t know what it is about her. She always looks EXACTLY the same to me no matter what she wears.

    Sara

  27. Jen from cincy
    0

    I honestly have never seen such high-waisted shorts. And I sort of wish I’d never seen these. That said, I love the black and white dress. I would totally wear it in some alternate universe where horizontal stripes do not make me look like a parade float.

  28. Sajorina
    0

    I like the dress & the red lips… I think she looks BEAUTIFUL! And, the performance outfit would probably look better with black or red stilettos instead of those shoes, but it is far from awful! I do wish she’d do something else with her hair!

    I like that she’s so ladylike and would never criticize her for it because that’s who she is! And, I think that’s a good thing to be! I would love to look that well put together all the time, but I don’t have a glam squad! *sigh*

  29. Franziska
    0

    I love the black and white dress but not on Taylor. I think on someone five years younger it would look supercute.

  30. Emma
    0

    You need to trademark “Fringehead McLippy.”

  31. Sarah O
    0

    Love the black and white dress. So pretty! But those bangs are a bit much. And the shorts, just NO.

  32. Dazie
    0

    I LOVE that red top. Put that with a snazzy skirt and HELLO NEW YEAR’S PARTY!

  33. Katy
    0

    I feel strange saying this, since Taylor is so young, but my main criticism of this dress is that it feels a little young for her. I don’t think the shape of it it really goes with the red lipstick and the general air of fifties-ladylike-version-of-glamorous. There’s something about the high waist and full skirt combined with a not very fitted top that makes this seem like the perfect outfit for a fourteen-year-old who’s in the public eye and wants to look nice without scandalizing anyone.

  34. BZ
    0

    Kate Spade?

  35. GeorgiaGirl
    0

    I actually find her look always tasteful and charming and refreshing. I like its consistency. I will also own up to the fact that sometimes it’s hard for me to separate the person from the outfit. For example: I like her more for all the things she’s done in Nashville since the 2010 floods. She is known for going out of her way to greet fans, staying at events long after a show has ended in order to sign autographs. She’s always respectful in interviews. I’ve never seen her in a “scandal” besides her dating life, which seems less than scandalous to me. She seems geniune to me. I agree with others who have said she can’t win (and not because of this site, but just in general). If a girl is too “good” and dresses conservatively it seems contrived; if she dates a lot, she’s a slut. It’s tiring. I’m not even that big of a fan – and definitely not the demographic she’s going for – but I like her anyway and love her personal style.

  36. Lily1214
    0

    I saw her on TV and finally listened to her sing. She’s definitely not much of a singer. But she tries. This black and white dress is too young for her.