I’m curious how the Oscar race will shake out, because while Sandra Bullock is great in Gravity, it’s not really her movie or Clooney’s movie so much as it is the director’s movie. It’s a showcase of technique. I read that it was originally supposed to be Angelina Jolie and Robert Downey, Jr., and in a rarity, I think it would’ve been close to the same experience with them in it. Sandy does do some of the character’s backstory and introversion better than Jolie might’ve, I think, but still — the point is, to me, it belongs to Alfonso Cuaron more than it does to the performers or their performances, and I suspect voters might agree. But it depends whom she’s up against. Against whom she’s up. Up against whom she is. No: “It depends against whom she’s competing.” THERE we go.

It is not a spoiler to tell you that there are several moments in Gravity where I thought, “I want her arms and her legs for Christmas.”

That is still true. And her lipstick is great, and I like that she looks strong and healthy and fit but never deprived. But she doesn’t give off an aura of being at one with the Stella McCartney dress. It’s a smidge short — like, Kristen Stewart short — and just sort of… there. Her legs are stars, but her torso is rendered totally free of topography, it almost seems like it’s too small on her shoulders, and her head seems tense, like it would rather be poking out of a sweatshirt while she took Louis out for burgers in Austin. Which may be true. She could put that sweatshirt on OVER this dress, and she’d look like a walk of shame in progress, and yet still it might be better than her seeming so stiff and underwhelmed by herself. Remember from 10 Things I Hate About You: “You can be overwhelmed, and you can be underwhelmed, but can you ever be whelmed?” “Um. I think you can in Europe?” Well, she was definitely whelmed in Europe. FIND YOUR EUROPE, SANDY. BE WHELMED. HAVE A WHELMING.

How do you feel about this?

  • Overwhelmed! (8%, 469 Votes)
  • Underwhelmed (10%, 577 Votes)
  • The perfect amount of whelmed. (52%, 2,897 Votes)
  • Sorry, I'm not here to take your call right now. I am in LEG CITY. (29%, 1,578 Votes)

Total Voters: 5,521

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[Photo: Getty]