Fug or Fab: Cate Blanchett


fug-or-fab

Well, her head looks amazing. But the rest of it, I should not even be putting up to a vote:

This is unflattering on her — ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE — and it also looks like it suffered some kind of GRIEVOUS accident at the dry cleaner, prompting the most scorching review that establishment has ever seen. NO STARS.

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[Photo: Splash]

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Comments (71):

  1. Amanda
    +12

    Even Her Cateness cannot rock that mess.

  2. qwertygirl
    +2

    This is a skirted mesh Rorschach test. I see a big open flower stradling her collar bones. It’s actually a bit disturbing.

  3. Annie E
    +3

    I actually think I would like it (on her) if the bottom was like the top and there was no hideous unflattering tulle.

    •  Vandalfan
      +2

      I’m with you. The pleated tulle and off-set hems don’t work, but I adore the spider web effect, with every fiber of my being.

      I love the top part. And her lipstick, too.

  4. Ruth
    +6

    I don’t think SWINTON could pull this travesty off. I think the worst part is the asymmetry. Spiders are more meticulous than that!

    • simply_readd
      +9

      Swinton would blanch — becoming transparent, I suspect — at being presented with this dress by a stylist … SHE. WOULD. NOT!!

  5. Kate
    +8

    She is really testing the limits of my love for her.

  6. Tar Heel Gal
    +1

    Was it her first chance to see Spiderman on Broadway after her own movie premiere, and it just happened to be “dress as a character in the play” night?! The fit is indeed hideous, asymmetrical spider webbing, good grief. But, ha, love that she has commoner nails like me! Too cute!

  7. Elizabeth
    +10

    The asymmetry just makes her look like she buttoned herself wrong.

  8. luvthefuggers
    +1

    Someone had to have begged her to wear it, or paid her. I’d do it for money.

  9. Rachel
    0

    It would be alright if there were net long sleeves and she had super dramatic makeup.

    I think the face is there on purpose

  10. Other Emily
    +3

    Wow. I’m in so much pain right now. I love Queen Blanchett so much, but there is nothing nice I can say about this dress. I don’t know if I’ve ever felt this way about her before. thank god for her perfect, perfect head.

  11. Alison
    +7

    I feel like she accidentally wandered onto the set of American Horror Story: Coven and they put her in this before she could escape.

  12. val.
    +4

    Now that I’ve seen the face on the dress, I can’t UNsee it, and it’s creeping me out. I do NOT like this.

    • simply_readd
      +8

      It’s not only a face but a face looking blankly at a naked female torso. It’s the male gaze made flesh.

      • qwertygirl
        +4

        EW EW OH YOU GUYS!!! This is SO DISTURBING. Now I see that torso too! This is going to give me nightmares.

        • val.
          +2

          Ack I see the torso now, too! That’s it. I refuse to look at this picture ever again.

      •  Stplaz
        +1

        Omg, NO. I actually voted for the middle poll option before I noticed this. Teach me to vote before having a good look at the garment. Do not want.

  13. simply_readd
    +7

    This is less a dress than a graphic representation of my feelings viewing it. I have a pill to take now.

  14. CSG
    +14

    CRAZY FACE DRESS WILL KILL US ALL!

  15. Theresa Robinson
    0

    I want to see it moving. Sometimes things only work in motion.

    • Rachel
      +2

      Movement doesn’t really change it that much :/

      video

      •  HelenBackAgain
        +2

        No, but somehow it makes me feel a little better that she wore this in France. I can’t explain why.

        It still might give me nightmares.

  16. Jules
    0

    I wander what the back looks like?

  17. Maria L.
    +6

    And yet, from a technical point of view, I cannot help but admire it — and her fearlessness in wearing it.

  18.  Miss Jane
    +6

    So there IS a limit to the Carte Blanchett effect.

    Tip: when the fact that your boobs look to be asymmetrically waist-adjacent is not the scariest part of your dress, you should probably change.

  19. Bianca
    +2

    No. Honestly, I love her, but no.

  20. Evalyn
    +4

    for a second, I pictured this on Helen Bonham-Carter, but even her crazy could not sustain this dress.

  21. LB
    +1

    I don’t like the spiderwebbyness and the face and stuff but what I really don’t like is the asymmetry. I can’t do that stuff. I love things to be symmetrical. Always. It’s just the way I am.

    Her face looks pretty.

  22. Kristin Cass
    +4

    It looks like she walked into a halloween decoration and just went with it.

  23. Hannah
    +4

    No you may not, Cate Blanchett. Now take that spider web and those horrid shoes off and think about what you’ve done.

  24. BrownEyedBetty
    0

    OK, so CB no longer gets C(arte) B(lanche) anymore. At least not in my book.

  25.  anne
    0

    I know it’s an optical illusion, but the asymmetry of the skirt ALSO makes her look like Svetlana on the Sopranos.

  26. Roz
    +4

    I’m the only one that likes this, I guess. It is totally unique and original. I love it, although I would love it a lot more in red.

    • Sajorina
      +4

      I like it too and applaud her for being so bold! I love your idea of making it red, though!

  27. Mina
    +1

    This is what happens when you let Tim Burton dress an actress.

  28. Debbie Hoad
    +2

    There should be a voting option, ‘love the top, hate the skirt.’ The top half is interesting. Would love to see it with pants.

  29. Debbie Hoad
    0

    I just realised what I thought was the ‘top’ is actually created by the overlaid garment’s design. Pity. That would have been a creative and interesting top.

  30. Tiffany
    +1

    I love Cate but I do not love this!

  31. Claire1
    +1

    Before I noticed the whole torso fiasco….I thought that the nipple on the faux torso made it look like her own had dropped…..
    YIkes!!!

  32.  HelenBackAgain
    +10

    I understand why it seemed like an interesting idea. I really, really do.

    I don’t understand how, once it was made, no one looked at it and said, “That’s the sartorial representation of Ed Gein. We have to start over.”

  33. Moxie Lola Carroll
    +1

    It’s the unholy union of a black widow spider and a binder full of graph paper.

  34. Claire1
    +6

    Here’s the thing…If I saw this hanging on a canvas…I would, without shame, LOVE IT!

    •  HelenBackAgain
      +2

      Now there’s an idea. Maybe this designer should take up painting instead. This would be fascinating wall art.

  35. Carl
    0

    Smoking my spiderweb lily pipe for a total babe, CHAaaaaaaa!

  36.  Nee S
    0

    This is what I imagine you would get if Target brought out a line inspired by Helena Bonham Carter.

  37. daphne
    0

    ok, if the dress were on anyone else, I wouldn’t give it a second thought. heck, I’d barely give it a first thought ! it would be a thumb DOWN, a la Roman emperor style (!), throw the black schmatte to the lions !

    but for La Divina, Cate ? she comes with (mumble-a-number) free Fug passes ! for me..

    sigh.

    so I’m gonna opt for the Metaphorical: she is wearing Jasmine’s ‘web of lies’ ! in Goth black. perfect, no ? !

    Jasmine is a weird Woody Allen mish-mash of Blanche DuBois + Ruth Madoff.. whom I ought to dislike intensely. but. Cate made Jasmine positively luminous with pathos by the final scene.. gave her genuine, tragic dimension-

    I’m gonna go with the dress.. as a fitting comment on the film/role. a delicate mess of strange, creeping, black, not-quite-lace.. over luminous, pale satin and paired with Cate’s radiant face and grace.

    beauty is in the eye of the fan, eh?!

  38. Bets
    +1

    Ewwwww.

  39. Terri Watson
    +1

    The face on her stomach is scowling at her shoes!!

  40. daphne
    0

    .. Jasmine dressed in her WEB OF LIES- in Goth black.

    perfect ? !

  41. nobody much
    0

    holy crap this is bad. lumpy, misbuttoned, and eww. (didn’t read all the comments, but everyone else probably said the same.)

  42. bucket
    +2

    Just stupid. She lucked out early in her career but she really is an idiot.

  43. bucket
    +1

    Did you know she can read English but she can’t write it? Think about it?