Fug Madness 2013, Sweet Sixteen: Madonna Bracket, Part I


(2) KIM KARDASHIAN vs. (3) CARLY RAE JEPSEN

If only it were three years ago and I could make a gif of Kanye popping into this slideshow, saying, “IMMA LET YOU FINISH, CARLY, BUT EVERYONE KNOWS KIM HAD THE FUGLIEST YEAR OF ALL TIME!” Sadly, I can no longer make that joke. But it would have been AMAZING, you guys. Kim sailed into this game, while CRJ had to fight to make it past Halle Berry in the last round. Does she have enough in the tank to take down THE KARDASHIAN? Look at the slideshow and make your choice!

(PS: As always, the archives are here for you: Kim Kardashian, CRJ)

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Comments (61):

  1. Lucille Austero
    0

    Was terribly torn between CRJ’s fugly cheap looking fug and KK’s fugly expensive looking fug. Until I got to slide 17. Highwaisted maybe brocade too tight ruffle peplumed pants will always win. Or lose.

    • Katty McNiley Ripley
      0

      Yes, the same thing happenned to me…

      Those are truly hideous, and I truly believe they will give the Fug Victory to Kim!

      • jenny
        0

        I’m pretty positive that her win will be due to our cumulative awareness of the awfulness of not that just that outfit but almost every single thing she has worn since declaring pregnancy. And our dread of having to see more of it for MONTHS.

  2. AmandaD
    0

    I got totally distracted from Kim by the fur coat ( fur shrug? leather/fur combo?) on the dude behind her in #11. That’s an impressively ugly coat.

  3. jen310
    0

    I despise the K, all of them, but this one the most. The rage I feel for her influences my vote but her fug stylings are the true reason she wins. I want her to go away – far, far away – but her fug cannot be bested by the likes of CRJ.

    CRJ is being misdirected by her people and probably doesn’t know any better. Hopefully, she’ll learn.

    Kim’s fug is deliberate. Her skanky, ill-fitting, desperate fug is heinous and a crime against God, man, and nature. That is some Ninth Circle of Hell fug right there which is, in fact, a place I’d like her and her entire clan to go far away to.

    Run, Kanye, RUN.

    • pantsonfire
      0

      Preach. So well said.

      • Jane
        0

        Word. I never thought I’d see the day where I thought Kanye West would be the superior half of a relationship.

    • Freez-N-Shine
      0

      No, I think Kanye is right where he belongs, right in the Ninth circle with Kim. I am not convinced that the no maternity clothes “idea” isn’t him. It’s like neither of them realized she was going to change size and shape when she carried the baby.

      • Helen
        0

        Agreed. Kanye has no taste either.

        • Helen
          0

          Although I still say he looked good in that skirt. It was just too bad about the rest of the outfit.

      • pantsonfire
        0

        Oh, I agree. They are very deserving of each other. He’s horrid. She’s horrid. It’s perfect. And terrible.

    • ZinJoJo
      0

      I’m with you all the way. But KK’s style has only become even more fug since her pregnancy; it’s still early in the year, but she’s already my clear frontrunner for Fug Madness 2014.

      I shudder to think how that poor child will be dressed.

  4. Anna Svahn
    0

    I thought Kanye was supposed to be helping her dress better. That fishnet/lace monstrocity won it for me. I don’t hate her, I don’t watch any of her shows, and well, fine. She can be for all I care. Doesn’t really impact my life in anyway beyond mild amusement.

  5. TereLiz
    0

    Yeah, this one is KK, all the way. I wanted to go easy on her, since she is pregnant in a bunch of these pics, right? She’d look so much better if she was comfortable in the clothes she’s wearing. Instead she just looks silly and miserable.

    Is it really true that she’s not wearing maternity clothes because Kanye doesn’t want her to? EFF THAT, Kim! He’s not the boss of you. Or if it’s your prerogative not to wear maternity clothes, look into a wrap dress. Or an empire waist. That way, in July, when you want to wear nothing but caftans, no one will look twice.

  6. glee
    0

    Seriously, someone thought this would go to CRJ? Ha!

  7. Freez-N-Shine
    0

    Kim was an easy choice even without figuring in her choice to forgo maternity clothes in lieu of regular designer clothes in really big sizes. It’s almost like she doesn’t realize pregnant and size 24 are totally different, for many reasons.

    It’s almost as if she’s not intelligent.

    And frankly, I’m starting to question her taste.

  8. Amanda In Austin
    0

    This one had me seriously torn. CRJ is so ridic, pretending to be 16 and failing miserably. KKard is tacky beyond compare.

    I think the tipping point for me was KKard’s shrug made from a Bissell mop.

    • abm
      0

      @Amanda, I must argue! That shrug was clearly made from a Libman mop head. (I can tell by some of the pixels …)

  9. foo
    0

    In slide 13, I think Kanye is mouthing the word “help” to the photographer. Or he smoked a lot of dope to stand next to that dress. Either/or.

    KK is fug. That slideshow of her is some vicious, fur wearing, leather stretching, vulture with dreadlocks collared, *that skirt is made of your mother’s pubic hair, all the mirrors in the house are lying to you and so is everyone else you know, what in the ever loving hell is going on here- fug.

    *paraphrase of a Dave Chappelle quote for humor purposes only. Not an actual insult to mothers.

  10. Charlotte
    0

    Kim K, as a pregnant lady, would usually get a pass from me…except she’s been purposely stuffing herself into what must be the most horribly uncomfortable outfits, allegedly eschewing maternity wear because she doesn’t want to “look fat.” Which, there are so many things wrong with that, I can’t even.

    I saw a pic of her in the Daily Fail Mail, wearing what must have been a custom leather monstrosity stretched over her pregnant belly. She looked miserable, and she must have been boiling. But damn, girl, you’re doing it to yourself. I’m not saying you have to dress like HRH The Duchess Kate, but a wrap dress won’t kill you.

    • Billie
      0

      THIS. And Courtney did pregnant really well, twice. You’d think Kim would see that and take some hints.

    • Aphy
      0

      Exactly. This isn’t the 80s and 90s when maternity clothes were heinous. There are a ton of options out there. I’m just as short and pregnant as she is. Cute maternity tops and bottoms are out there!

  11. Neil
    0

    What if they gave a contest and you wanted neither to win? CRJ would mean 2 Canadians going deep in the Madness and, well, we have a reputation to protect. KK would mean another week or so of….KK. Arrrggghhhh.

  12. lilywise
    0

    This was tougher than I thought — I had forgotten most of the CRJ fugs. But in the end, that’s what tipped my vote to KK. CRJ had forgettable fug. I wish I could forget the horrors of KK fug.

    Any chance GFYKanye will write the KK entry for the next round? :)

    • LT1
      0

      Yeah, it was tougher than I thought it would be too but it turns out CRJ’s hair is the thing I remember/don’t like the most so I guess I’ll have to go KK.

  13. Mary
    0

    A) If you’re going to be famous for no real reason, at least DRESS YOURSELF WELL.
    B) I don’t know whether it’s Kim choosing not to wear maternity, or Kanye, but either way: What. Like many have said, there’s a difference between gaining weight because you eat too much, and gaining weight BECAUSE THERE IS A TINY HUMAN INSIDE YOU. I mean, some women definitely go through their entire pregnancy without showing, but I don’t think Kim is. Also I feel like it might be painful for her fetus. I mean, biologically that probably doesn’t make sense but still, if I were a fetus I wouldn’t want my mother to be wearing those pants and squishing me so she looks skinnier.

    • camille
      0

      Whereas if I were her fetus I would be so uncomfortable out of sheer embarrassment that I wouldn’t even notice I was being wrangled into constrictive clothing that has dreadlocks.

    • Aphy
      0

      She doesn’t even look thinner. She looks ridiculous and uncomfortable. I’m short too, so the pregnancy starts showing really fast. I already look 7 months along when im only barely 5 months. She needs to accept this fact and wear flattering and comfortable clothes.

  14. jinny
    0

    Prediction: The peplum pants will prove to be unbeatable.

    • Charlotte
      0

      Even over Bieber’s purple leopard print, diaper butt crime against humanity?

      I will say that Fug Madness seems to often come down to crazy pants. There were Hudge’s Lace Pants Heard ‘Round The World last year, and pregnant peplum pants this year. So I guess the lesson is don’t abuse the power of pants.

      • Tiffany
        0

        I think KK and Bieber fugging it out in the top 2 sounds appropriate…but I think wee little Beibi should take #1. He brings the fug like no one else.

      • Aphy
        0

        His purple diaper pants aren’t eligible this year….boo!

  15. karen
    0

    As a 5 months pregnant, curvy lady whose name also starts with a K I’d like to point out that one does not have to wear maternity clothes to look cute, for god’s sake. I’ve been rocking boyfriend jeans, tight tee shirts and 3 inch high ankle booties and I look slammin. I’ll grant the first couple months were tough cuz I just looked chubby but she has the benefit of the whole world knowing she’s knocked up so there’s no excuse for her fuggery. Well except for the fact that she’s ALWAYS had terrible taste in clothes, did we really think hormones would change that?

    • Tiffany
      0

      I think people encourage her to wear maternity clothing because she looks so dang uncomfortable in her “normal” clothes. What you are rocking sound way more in tune with a pregnant body than Kim’s high-waisted peplum jeans, for example. Her clothing has been so tight it looks painful.

      • Helen
        0

        >> I’ve been rocking boyfriend jeans, tight tee shirts and 3 inch high ankle booties and I look slammin.

        Uh-huh. I have some land futures in Florida which might make a good investment for you…

        • pantsonfire
          0

          Helen, you are one of my favorite commenters.

          I can’t even manage three-inch heels normally. I think I’m missing the part of the X chromosome that provides women with that skill. That and event organizing (well, just organization in general, if I’m being honest).

          • Helen
            0

            Thank you, my dear, the feeling is mutual.

            I do occasionally wear three-inch heels, myself, but I am not very organized while they are on. Or at any other time.

      • Aphy
        0

        People encourage her to wear maternity clothes because she has a pregnant body. They truly are more flattering than a few sizes up everyday clothes.

    • Charlotte
      0

      Three inch heels while you’re five months pregnant? Well. You’re a braver woman than I.

      And again, I don’t think the issue is that KK is wearing maternity clothes – the issue is that she *isn’t*, and it’s making her miserable. If you’re going to be more comfortable wearing maternity clothes, then wear the f’in maternity clothes. It’s a pregnancy, not a fashion show. No one’s going to begrudge a pregnant woman some flats and a belly band. And no pregnant woman should feel ashamed of wearing maternity clothes.

      • pantsonfire
        0

        I read somewhere that she has these leather skirts that she’s been wearing custom-made. That is mind-blowing. That she would choose to wear tight leather while in that expanded state. I just see these photos of the sun beating down on her leather-encased enlarged abdomen, and I cringe.

        • Kristin
          0

          During my fourth month of pregnancy, many years ago, I ended up wearing a brown suede skirt almost every day to work because it stretched and was the only thing I owned that still sort-of fit. Once I could no longer button a blazer over that poor stretched-out skirt, it was time to ‘fess up to my boss and break out the maternity wear. Unfortunately, that meant I was stuck in ghastly floral muumuus with immense portrait collars for the duration. I never understood how dressing a pregnant woman like a toddler was supposed to fool anybody.

          So I sort of get where Kim is coming from, but it simply isn’t working.

  16. michelle
    0

    I still think the Vag Napkin was the worst atrocity ever on GFY, especially the jump to pics when said napkin blew away and… ugh I can’t go any farther. That said, its the peplum pants FTW!

    • Vandalfan
      0

      Yes, I can’t believe the vag-kin alone didn’t go all the way.

      • pantsonfire
        0

        It’s because no one knew who the hell the Vag-kinner was. Even after her coverage on this site, if you were to stick her in a lineup, I’d be at a loss. Is it number 3? Number 3, please step forward and swish your vag-kin to the left. You know, officer, I’m just not sure. Notice I can’t remember her name (like, literally no clue) — she is just The Vag-kinner. I think she’s maybe a natural brunette? Don’t ask me how I remember that.

        I just don’t think you can win Fug Madness as a no-name. But Sandra Bullock in a vag-kin and hell yes, she’d rocket to the Final Four, vag-kin billowing behind her in an emphatic, yet still down-to-earth, girl-next-door Bullocky way.

  17. camille
    0

    Neither of them have apparently ever worn something that fits.

  18. TonyG
    0

    My choice is CRJ, because her casual wardrobe is copped from a teenager in southern Indiana (i.e., it’s an impressive hodge-podge of cheap and tacky looks).

  19. tigers4us
    0

    Sigh. Now that I’ve figured out the difference between Jessie J and Carly Rae, I decided that Carly Rae’s look was fuglier. And I didn’t base my vote on the fact that I simply cannot stand Kim K and that she is hideous inside and out. Carly Rae is a newbie and just establishing herself, so we shall see what the future brings.

    • Helen
      0

      >>Now that I’ve figured out the difference between Jessie J and Carly Rae…

      Oh thank Dog, I thought it was just me! That took me FOREVER.

      • Charlotte
        0

        I’m not gonna lie, I spent the first half of the Rita Ora-Jessie J matchup slideshow thinking it was CRJ.

        • amys
          0

          Ha! I just realized they were different people. I really need to pay closer attention while I’m frittering my time away over here.

  20. agcons
    0

    Jepsen looks foolish, but Kardashian takes it to a whole new level downward. The floral peplum jeans must not go unrewarded.

  21. Aimly
    0

    I had to go with CRJ just cuz I’m so sick of looking at KK that I just want her to go away. It’s like she’s ruining Fug Madness for me even.

  22. Vandalfan
    0

    Neanderdashian will go far on the strength of those trousers alone.

  23. Kate
    0

    Kim will go in the Fugly Hall of Fame and so needs to retire from competion. It just isn’t fair. No woman has tried so hard and spent so much to look so fugly. There should be a trophy named for her fugliciousness.

  24. Scanderoon
    0

    I was also surprisingly torn until the slide with KK wearing the Pants. And then I remembered looking at them on another site and the top she is wearing over them is a crop top. You can’t see it so well in this photo, but… I don’t think there is anything that can beat those monstrous pants with an inch of exposed midriff. *shudder*

  25. Sajorina
    0

    KK takes my vote! DISGUSTING!

  26. Miss Scruffy
    0

    I think Kim is channelling her inner Jon Snow from Game of Thrones with all that pelt action. Maybe she should score a guest role as a Wildling.

  27. Chris P
    0

    On one hand, I really think CRJ deserves a trip to the Fuglite Eight. Mostly because I don’t want to see more of Kim.

    On the other hand, winning Fug Madness seems to be the best way to get rid of celebrities. And THE PANTS. When Katie Price wears a midsection ruffle better than you, you know that’s fug.

    When Katie Price wears a midsection ruffle better than you while simultaneously wearing a My Little Pony’s butt attached to her own (and the sparkliest platform stilettos in all of Equestria), you know that’s fug.

    On GoT: Kim is totally not wildling material. She’s so southron it hurts. She’d totally fit in as a madam at one of Littlefinger’s brothels, though.

  28. michelle
    0

    Kim has way more money than Carly. She has no excuse for looking this ridiculous. Hire a decent stylist!!!

  29. Sylvia
    0

    I voted Kim. I just…words fail y’all. CRJ does bring the fug, but she cannot compete with the other worldly fug Kim is serving up.