(1) LADY GAGA vs. (16) PLAY-IN WINNER

(2) NICKI MINAJ vs. (15) JANUARY JONES

(3) KATIE HOLMES vs. (14) JULIETTE LEWIS

(4) VARIOUS KARDASHIANS vs. (13) THE WIDOW LONGORIA

(5) PAZ DE LA HUERTA vs. (12) EVA MENDES

(6) CHRISTINA AGUILERA vs. (11) CHERYL COLE

(7) MIA WASIKOWSKA vs. (10) LEA MICHELE

(8) MICHELLE WILLIAMS vs. (9) AMBER ROSE

It’s really hard to divide the Kardashians, so we decided, why bother? They market themselves together, and they will be judged thusly. We also like that the online randomizer put Michelle Williams and Amber Rose against each other, because when ELSE are they going to be mentioned in the same sentence?

And the play-in game: MADONNA vs CHER, Tuesday, March 15

What can we say? Madonna and Cher didn’t go out much this year, but when called upon — Madge at the Oscars; Cher for Burlesque – each had one memorably insane ensemble that we feel makes this clash a perfect storm. The legends will vie for the right to face off against the upstart. Unbelievably, we didn’t plan that, either — the randomizer decided, as it does with everything. And if you don’t believe in a higher power, well, that could be proof you might want to start.