Freaky Fug Friday: Cate Blanchett


freaky-fug-friday

Because she rules:

THE SITUATION:  Cate Blanchett looks for something in her purse….

THE TASK: ….what is it? YOU TELL US. Bonus points for creativity.

THE RULES: All entries must be posted in the comments of this post by 9 p.m. Pacific time on Sunday.

THE PRIZE:  To celebrate the paperback release of Joanna Philbin’s book The Daughters Join the Party,  we are giving away three AUTOGRAPHED copies of said book. You will love it! What is it about? Per Amazon: “Emma has never fit into the sweater-set-wearing world of her political family, opting for purple hair and Chuck Taylors to keep herself out of countless photo ops, but when she accidentally lets her father’s presidential plans slip on national television, Emma finds herself thrown into the spotlight. Facing pressure to be the perfect First Daughter-in-training, Emma must learn to speak up for herself and for what she believes in. Thankfully, she has her new friends and fellow daughters – Lizzie, Carina, and Hudson – to help her along the way.” It’s really a charming, entertaining, delightful book — you don’t have to have read the entire Daughters series to love it — and whoever wins this will enjoy it, I promise you! So get to writing!

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Comments (82):

  1. Piglet the Pooh
    0

    Benjamin Button. By now he’s a single sperm, and will easily fit into the smallest handbag.

  2. Peter
    0

    That f*cking One Ring. It’s her birthday, and it’s Precious to her.

  3. Jill Hartzold Morino
    0

    I told Peter I didn’t need to carry a Hobbitt around with me to stay in character!

  4. ak
    0

    Hold on, hold on, Tilda left her phone at my house last week when we were crank-calling Gwyneth Paltrow, and it’s ringing somewhere under David Bowie’s mojo, my Ibsen script, and that lampshade I’m having turned into a sequined fez.

  5. Siobhán
    0

    Am I the only one who sees a bunch of other FFF posts attached to this one?

    Did you pour whiskey over your cornflakes, Jess? ;)

  6. Leah
    0

    jaguar shark

  7. Scully
    0

    Gwyneth Paltrow’s head.

  8. Courtney
    0

    I can’t believe I signed up for two more movies about hobbits – those Tolkien-its will be all over me again. Galadriel, I love you. Galadriel, marry me…blah, blah, blah. Maybe this is a magic Mary Poppins purse, and I can pull an invisible cape out of it. Go incognito, Potter-style.

  9. kristin
    0

    She’s looking for Neo and the rest of the Matrix.

  10. Amber
    0

    She’s actually not looking for anything–she has Justin Bieber hidden in there (she’s a closet Belieber) and she’s making sure he has enough air. They’re running off together because he’s tired of being chased by teenage girls and she’s tired of everyone believing she can do no wrong. Win/win.

  11. Andrea
    0

    The Loki’s glow stick of destiny (see Avengers), because you know if anyone had it, it would be Cate (or maybe SWINTON).

  12. Kimberly H
    0

    She is obviously searching for the keys to her invisible jet.

  13. McLisa
    0

    “Hold on, just a sec Jess… I’m trying to remember if I gave The Beiber’s hair clippings to Tobey or if I still have them. They might be here in the bottom of my bag.”

  14. Libby
    0

    The invisible ball of infinite mass that fell in there. She’s about to drop the purse, but she doesn’t want to lose the purse or have the bottom drop out. She’s got like 3 seconds before it all becomes impossible to reverse.

  15. ML
    0

    “Bunny?”

  16. Celeste
    0

    her foldable sceptre

  17. Chasmosaur
    0

    “Elizabeth’s scepter and orb…Lady Chiltern’s necklace…Hepburn’s golf ball…Galadriel’s crown…stupid Crystal Skull…cool 1950′s Ripley cloche…Lucinda’s cards….I really need to clean this bag out more often….”

  18. Lucille Austero
    0

    “Need to look awesome… Where did I put my ….? No, wait. There is Absolutely Nothing missing.”

  19. daphne
    0

    “No, no, that’s the wrong map. I need the pre-Akallabeth one, this time.. for fact-checking. < sighs > tedious, really, but I think it’ll be such a lovely present, don’t you? the complete family tree for Dashiell, Roman and Ignatius!”

  20. Carol
    0

    “I know Galadriel would just wave her wand and the car would start, but right now, I need my keys!”

  21. daphne
    0

    p.s. my vote is for Chasmosaur’s entry! (-: so far

    • Chasmosaur
      0

      :) Thanks.

      Mostly it reflects my deep love of Cate Blanchett’s body of work. I will watch her in anything.

  22. daphne
    0

    except that Galadriel does not wear a crown and HALF MY ENTRY IS INVISIBLE because I inserted ” around 2 sentences )-:

  23. Irma
    0

    “OMG. I am running late for my lunch with Meryl. Where is that silly banana hair clip?”

  24. Claire L1
    0

    She’s looking for a role that she CAN’T nail……..

    Keep looking Cate, I don’t think it exists.

  25. Ameliateca
    0

    Her own personal Dorian Gray-ish picture because the lady does not age.

  26. paige
    0

    She’s checking on Josh Hutcherson, who she stashed away in her purse because she thinks he’d be a great extra in “The Hobbit”.

  27. lakin1013
    0

    The Light of Galadriel, so that she can touch-up her makeup.

  28. christine christine
    0

    “Damn. When I sold my soul to Satan for that Milk of Eternal Youth and Beauty, I wish I had known I’d lose it in this giant-ass bottomless purse.”

  29. Caroleena Stantonova
    0

    Tilda Swinton

  30. mue
    0

    Where’s that item for the museum?

  31. gail
    0

    “Tom Cruise acting in another movie where he basically just plays himself? Let’s see, I know I have plenty of talent to spare, I could give him some if I could just find it in this purse…”

  32. Andi
    0

    Does it matter? Because in The Matrix… “IT” is only in your mind.

    • Andi
      0

      … to clarify – I know she wasn’t in the movie.

      But as she’s wearing Neo’s coat and sunglasses, maybe she is looking in her purse for a way to get to The Matrix.

  33. Daniella
    0

    “The Oscar she should have won for Elizabeth”

  34. Art Eclectic
    0

    Cate:
    “Hey, there’s a trash can over there. Will you toss this hideous jumpsuit that Stella McCartney gave me this morning in it?”

    Random Hand:
    “With pleasure.”

  35. TonyG
    0

    Her Oscar. To bludgeon the paparazzi who just caught her in that wig…er…hairstyle?

  36. Samantha
    0

    She’s looking for her “How to Look Like Courtney Love” handbook.

  37. CM
    0

    The hatrack Mary Poppins pulls out of her carpetbag.

  38. ProudMary
    0

    “Now…where did I put my studded, black leather aviator’s cap? No, darling, not the one with the rubies…it is daytime after all!!!”

  39. Kate
    0

    A new purse. That thing looks like a book bag that a poor girl in the 80s carried to school, something her unshaven liberal mother handed down to her after finding a new grocery bag. I like unshaven liberals for certain, but Cate can probably invest in something a bit more jazzy.

  40. kdots
    0

    Diana’s sapphire engagement ring. Kate’s is a fake because, let’s face it, only the most awesome Cate in the world should have it.

  41. JF
    0

    Brad Pitt’s number. In exchange, random hand person will stop attempting to photobomb her at every turn.

  42. ceecee
    0

    A calendar, because it’s June and she’s wearing leather and black tights. She looks hot, and not the good kind.

  43. Rose
    0

    That infamous and much maligned grandmother-crochet dress.

  44. ellenderavenous
    0

    She’s not looking for anything. She’s awkwardly fumbling in her bag in order to avoid eye contact with Christian Bale as he goes ballistic on the key grip again.

  45. Marianne Again
    0

    No! You may not come out again! Don’t make me go in there.

    PS: I agree with Lucile Austero up there…

  46. dreamz
    0

    Nemo

  47. Laura
    0

    Her First Response pregnancy test results because it’s been too long since she’s been knocked up.

  48. Amy
    0

    Cate is trying to find Lindsay Lohan’s career…

  49. Benjamin Kress
    0

    Cate grips her phone within her purse
    As she approaches a black hearse;
    “I know my clothes might match the scene,
    But I asked for a limousine;
    My handlers will hear me be terse.”

  50. Rhiannon
    0

    Keanu Reeve’s phone number, to check if he’s still in for her reboot of The Matrix.

  51. Emily
    0

    For christ sake, the blue pill would have been a much better idea… You know me Lizy, i’m not one to refuse a little recreational experimentation every now and then… But when he promised me he’d show me the depths of the rabbit-hole, I must have got the wrong idea…

  52. Ghanimatrix
    0

    Hmmm, I must have left my elixir for eternal youth and beauty in my other bag!

  53. EB
    0

    As La Blanchett peruses her bag for what scholars and mystics alike have searched for since the beginning of time, her BPA-free bottle of water from the fountain of youth, she realizes she left it at home and hoped the hobbits didn’t get a hold of it again.

  54. cc
    0

    She’s looking for some spare change so she can get rid of the (suspiciously well-groomed) beggar that’s been following her around for the past 20 minutes.

  55. yeahandalso
    0

    Obviously she is looking for her spare vial of virgin blood because if she doesn’t take it on the hour her skin will no longer look like that.

  56. Mrs o
    0

    Her phone, duh.

  57. NumberSix
    0

    Cate is frantically searching for the chameleon circuit control, because this TARDIS is too f***ing hard to get into.

  58. Lilibet
    0

    Cate (peering in): Y’know this bag goes on forever, there is no end to it, it’s just a …bbblack …hooolllllle……..(disappears forever into bag).

  59. Beth
    0

    One hobbit foot and three elf ears.

  60. Angie
    0

    CRAP. I’ve lost my Oscar. Guess that means it’s time to get another one…

  61. TonyG
    0

    Marty’s score, Peter’s jacks, Steven’s spiel, David’s finch, and Guillermo’s aria.

    (with a nod to Chasmosaur for her (or his?) post, which inspired mine)

  62. haydee
    0

    Some matches to help her friend burn her copy of Fifty Shades of Grey.

  63. Gen
    0

    Finally a break! Got my sandwich, got my diet coke now where is my f’**ing book? I can finally delve into Messy and catch up with Brooke and Molly!! Now, if only intern George was in town to give me a food rub, my life would be complete!!

    • Gen
      0

      Not a food rub but a foot rub obviously. Although a food rub from intern George could be nice as well, depending on the food… ;)

  64. Debra
    0

    I know my Oscar for Elizabeth is in here somewhere…I had it this morning when I left the house to have polished…could I have left it on the kitchen table next to my tea…Oh thats right I didnt win for Elizabeth…Silly Me!!!

  65. RR
    0

    Shit! I thought I ditched those Prada shoes from Hanna, they were literally the death of me!

  66. Alderene
    0

    Kim Kardashian’s dignity. Nobody has seen that in ages!

  67. Sandra
    0

    “You want my secret formula for ethereal beauty and all-around awesomeness? Sure, just let me find it in……oh wait! I was born like this. Sorry, can’t help you.”

  68. Marilyn
    0

    Rhachon le, idiot halflings, Middle-earth can get eaten by a Balrog, I QUIT. Now, I’ve dressed to walk into Mordor, but I can’t find that Álfheimr-forsaken RING…

  69. seriasly
    0

    “My ACTUAL purse has to be in here somewhere… someone please flag down a hobbit. so this ghastly sack can catch a ride straight back to Mordor.”

  70. Sajorina
    0

    Cate: “Where’s the label on this thing? They keep asking me “Who am I wearing?” and I have no idea!”

  71. Ren
    0

    The object in the briefcase in Pulp Fiction that shines with an unearthly golden light, just like her hair

  72. Ann
    0

    ‘Now where did I put that voodoo doll of Swinton?’

  73. Zoe
    0

    Colour. I need a colour. I must have something crocheted in here somewhere…