Fab the Hats: Royal Ascot, Day 1


BEHOLD: CRANIAL THUNDER.

[Photos: Getty]

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Comments (57):

  1.  CremeBrulee
    +35

    That first hat is the best hat in the history of hats.

    • Celeste
      +6

      I was just going to make the same remark–it’s fabulous!

    • Deborah
      +8

      Full.of.win.

    • SJAllison
      +6

      I was going to say the same thing. No. 2 was pretty great too.

    • Jen S 2.0
      +5

      Amen. Nothing, but nothing, even held a candle to it. That beflowered insanity was crazy and awesome and over-the-top and fabulous.

    • Joy
      +3

      And the dress is actually wonderful too. I saw a full picture of it on BuzzFeed and, wow, she just looks so regal and classy with the full effect,

  2. Gaëlle
    +6

    I think the British gentleman on slide 12 is Prince Michael of Kent, the Queen’s cousin.
    I love the two first over-seized flower hats. I love pink, I love flowers, what’s not to love.

    • Sandra
      +10

      Yup. The woman may well be Serena Linley, as it certainly is not Princess Michael, but the man is definitely Prince Michael.

      In re the first two photos: Was it Georgia O’Keefe Day at Ascot and nobody told me?

    • Kristen from MA
      +1

      Jackie St. Clair is a regular at Ascot and always wears one of those flower hats. She has an assortment of colors. I just love those hats!

    •  HelenBackAgain
      +3

      If that’s who he is, then wow, Prince Michael of Kent is a silver FOX and boy does he know how to wear things. Not just the hat, everything. He looks utterly dashing.

  3. Tar Heel Gal
    +5

    How DO they get in and out of their cars with those things?! Do those Royals have bubble tops like the Pope? I bet the British chiropractors have a boom in appointments after these luscious hat events with all the extra weight on the neck, the craning to see out from under the beauties, and even the eye doctors might get some extra business from eye/protruding hat thingies collisions! The British NIH should get a grant on that….

    •  HelenBackAgain
      +3

      You keep the top down and have the driver go REALLY SLOWLY.

      The non-titled version of which is, you carry it and put it on when you arrive.

  4. Celeste
    +3

    What’s up with Sophie? Has she thrown in the youth towel? She’s not that old, is she?

    • sema4dogz
      0

      That dress of Sophie’s is like a frumpier version of the dress Wallis Simpson wore to marry the ex King.

  5. Kris
    +1

    Is it just me, or has there not been much CRANIAL THUNDER at Royal Ascot this year? Last year was definitely CRANIAL THUNDER – someone wore a birdcage on their head, for God’s sake – but 2013 has been more DRIZZLE DERBY thus far. I hope they’re just getting warmed up.

    • Just me
      +2

      Thursday is Ladies Day, so they may be waiting until then to go full-on bonkers!

  6. AM
    +1

    I like Sophie’s dress. It’s a very pretty color. My neck hurts just looking at some of those hats. Even if they don’t weigh that much, they look like they do.

  7. Mair Mair
    +6

    Thank you for the Millinery Magnificence, Heather. Truly, you have made my day, if not my week.

  8. Mair Mair
    +8

    Millinery Magnificence.

  9. AJ
    +12

    My life needs more behatted tete-a-tetes. Immediately.

  10. Christine
    +6

    But when it gets really crowded like that, how do they all keep their hats from bumping into one another???

    •  HelenBackAgain
      +3

      They don’t. Hats bump hats all over the place. It’s hilarious!

  11. maryse
    +2

    yeah yeah the hats are nice. more former footballers please.

    and yeah, i’d noticed that henry was getting a little thin on top. sadness.

  12. valueofaloonie
    +35

    Well, we might as well just shut down the interwebs, guys. “Jeannie McWeeny” is the best thing you’re going to read all day.

  13. Lizzy
    +1

    I kinda love that the Queen has found a hat style that works and stuck with it (she must have it in every color imaginable).
    The first lady picked the perfect suit for her hat – totally plain & white – which makes it pop all the more. Love it!

  14. Nancy
    +3

    I am so jealous I live in NY, where we don’t wear hats! Why do British women wear hats when they get dressed up and to weddings, etc., and we don’t? Ive worn a hat to my kids’ Communions and some weddings, and everyone looked at me like I had two heads!

    Can the Fug Girls bring back hats for American women?

    • pidget
      +4

      This is one of the things I miss most about living in the UK – hats for Occasions. Now that I’m back in Canukistan, the closest I get to a proper hat is a toque. Not quite the same sartorial hijinks! Why don’t grownups get to play dress-up more often?

    • Janie
      +12

      Wrong church? Wrong ethnicity? African American women can ROCK some church hats.

  15. Chris
    +15

    Aishwarya knows how to Pose. If I tried that, I’d fall over. Well, done!

    • Jen S 2.0
      +4

      She also is rocking the ribbon-as-belt. I have tried that and I just end up looking like a sack of potatoes.

  16. DK
    +5

    I also love that many of the photos seem pre-promish. Lawn? check. Part of the driveway or your street making its way into your photos? check. Your neighbors’ houses in the background? check.

  17. Big Noise
    +4

    Oh my….is Gary Lineker pulling a Hamm-bone? Or do I just have an overactive imagination and a dirty mind? Wait — the second question is rhetorical, :) . But fellow GFYers, what about the first question? Thoughts?

    • Dazie
      +1

      Yeah. I looked.

      I think he has something in his pocket.

      •  HelenBackAgain
        0

        Agreed, keys, wallet, that sort of thing. Which he shouldn’t have done, it’s ruining the line of the pants, but it does not look anatomical to me.

    • TonyG
      0

      Definitely something in the pocket (::disappointed sigh::) as it seems to appear with no connection to the spot where all that man-ness would begin.

  18. Carla in Kentucky
    +1

    Don’t despair, Heather and other hat lovers: Come to Kentucky at Derby time and we will fix you up! https://www.facebook.com/#!/photo.php?fbid=3649241183135&set=a.3649206942279.157696.1037625220&type=3&theater

  19. Melissa Hogan
    +2

    I love that you love Gary Lineker.

  20. evalyn
    +4

    I advocate large hats a way to claim personal space. Those three ladies on the bench make me smile.

  21. Sweetsinger
    +2

    Hatastic!

  22. Kate
    +10

    I want to name a dog Yeoman Pricker.

  23. sarrible
    +4

    Aishwarya looks like she watched My Fair Lady really recently and took it as her inspiration. Which I think is terrific.

  24. Leigh
    0

    Mrs Lineker looks like she’s wearing her formal gardening gloves.

  25. tatiana.larina
    +1

    But can anybody actually see the horses from behind these hats?

  26. witjunkie
    +2

    Oh my goodness STEFAN EDBERG. There’s a guy who looked good in his tennis whites.

  27. TaraMisu
    +1

    I am so envious of people who can wear hats. I do not have a hat head. I can’t even wear a headband….. :(

  28. sara l
    +3

    I need one of these posts a day. Can that be arranged?

    Is it wrong to love Camilla and Charles? I was also a huge Diana fan…and I don’t think that contradicts, does it?

    • EdithHedren
      +1

      It’s totally fine to love C+C. She’s even established her own style staple – the huge-brimmed hat!

  29.  Stephanie
    0

    That First Lady looks like Cara from American Idol.

  30. Sajorina
    +4

    I’m IN LOVE with Katherine Jenkins’ outfit! WIN!!! And the last picture ROCKS!

  31. Laceflower
    0

    How the heck do they keep these hats on?!

  32. G
    0

    That final image belongs in a 1000 piece puzzle format.