Fugger: Zoe Saldana

Oscars Fug or Fab Carpet: Zoe Saldana in Prabal Gurung and Versace

I’m going to start with the one I personally like better: the Prabal Gurung from the Vanity Fair party.

2015 Vanity Fair Oscar Party Hosted By Graydon Carter - Arrivals

He’s used an extremely fussy, unedited, and dare I say it, deranged hand when designing for her in the past. But this is so elegant on her — it looks comfortable, it’s almost absurdly flattering, and it’s the kind of thing I imagine is very sad to take off because you don’t ever get to wear these things twice unless you’re planning a very posh afternoon scouring your tile counters and aren’t afraid of a little errant Soft Scrub.

I don’t actively dislike the Versace, either:

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Well Played, Zoe Saldana in Altuzarra

She seems so happy to be pregnant — seriously, she smiled before, but I don’t feel like we ever saw so many teeth as we are lately.

Zoe Saldana

She looks so great in this, too. The cut of it suggests that it’s a Regular Lady Dress that she’s using as maternity — the bust sits a smudge too high, right? – but I’m all for that. If it’s true that she’s pregnant with twins, I have BEEN THERE, and I applaud her for making this work so well because it is a huge self-esteem boost when you can do it. I had a friend who insisted I’d be in Crocs and Birkenstocks the whole time, and I DID NOT. I proudly wore heels right up until the day I went into labor, as if it were some dumb badge of honor. You take the victories where you can. So who cares where this is sitting on her chest, because she is gorgeous and glowing and BABIES! and I hope someday she can wear this again with a belt and a giant hat when she takes her kid(s) to a polo match or the beach or… anywhere. And if not, the line forms to the left of me for her “maternity” hand-me-downs.

[Photo: Fame/Flynet]


Fugs and Fabs: The ALMA Awards

There’s a Charo at the end of this slideshow.

[Photos: Splash, Fame/Flynet]



Well Played, Zoe Saldana in Preen

First of all: There are photos in which she looks far cheerier, never fear. But you can’t see her outfit in ANY OF THEM to which I have access, so smirky it is:

Zoe Saldana at the CANTINFLAS Premiere in Hollywood

The print is kind of like Collegiate Photography Show On Crack, and the dress is all Prim Schoolgirl, and it turns out that marriage is going to be one for the ages. Who knew?

[Photo: Fame/Flynet]


Fug or Fab: Zoe Saldana

This feels like half-robe, half-wrap dress.

Zoe Saldana at Audi pre-Emmy party

But when you are pregnant, robe-lite wrap dresses can be a comfortable DELIGHT, so whatever; I have no beef with that, conceptually. But I think the Wonderbread color scheme on those four bits — two on the lapels, two on the tie — make it look ESPECIALLY like pajamas, and I end up feeling vicariously tired and wishing that someone would just excuse her and let her go home and put up her feet. She’d be welcome over here, but it won’t be really hopping until I’ve acquired those crackpot new Cappucino potato chips to try. I haven’t had those or Mango Salsa, but VMA/Emmy weekend is the time for salt binges for everyone except the attendees, and those flavors have a LOT of work to do on me to beat Bacon Mac & Cheese. All of which ties back to this post because…. I would maybe wear that dress on my couch while I’m sampling.

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[Photo: Getty]


Fug/Fab the Cover Face-Off: Katie Holmes on Glamour vs Zoe Saldana on Marie Claire

We wrote about this Katie Holmes cover for Vanity Fair a couple weeks ago, as it compared to Brooke Shields’ iconic Calvin Klein ads. But somehow I didn’t notice it was sharing newsstand space with a similar theme. So now let’s throw THOSE into the Thunderdome, shall we?

Katie Holmes on Glamour, August 2014

I think Katie’s face looks great, and the alluring pose works on her — she’s good with a twinkle of naughty. But as we noted for Vanity Fair, I believe, my biggest problem is that I don’t actually like these jeans. I’m not a fan of the Trouser Jean, in general, but I’m distracted by the pockets flapping open at me, like they have something loud to say, and … let’s just say this: This one is the JEANS issue, not the DENIM issue, so you’d think they’d get the jeans part right; instead, her top half to me looks much more arresting than the bottom.

Also, and I know this is dumb, that ampersand above Angelina Jolie’s name looks too much like a treble clef. There, I said it.

Zoe stars on Marie Claire’s DENIM issue, which I am capsifying because boy, did they:

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Recent Fugs and Fabs: Zoe Saldana

Nope. Nothing to see here at all.

[Photos: AKM-GSI, Getty, Splash]