Fugger: Kristen Wiig
First of all, I don’t know if I was aware that she’d cut her hair, but it’s totally cute and sassy on her:
As, in fact, might this dress be. Sure, it’s like four outfits folded into one other outfit — one of which might have started life as a placemat — and yet, I am pretty sure I still enjoy it. Let me count the reasons:
- It is not beige.
- There is no choker being worn with a halter top. (No, I won’t ever get over that. LET ME HAVE MY RAGE.)
- The hemline is not gynecologically short
- My grandmother has never worn it to dash out and get the paper in the morning.
- Bracelet ahoy!
- Those shoes! They’re adorable.
Ergo, it MUST be a win. What do you think? Have I been too easily swayed by the glory of a list?
The good thing is, this is some serious trying:
I used a longer version of this in our last Valentino runway slideshow, and I’m still pretty intrigued by it. I wish the sleeves didn’t look so much like they were splitting open, and although it’s been tastefully lined in the chestal region, I just noticed it also seems like it’s pinching and shoving certain things. Also, is it too cutesy on her? Like, should Emma Stone be wearing this instead? But I think Wiig was correct (presumably) to assume that the longer version might be too much on her, and ALL HAIL her wearing neither black nor nude round-toe shoes. So even WITH the weird illusions of arm-bursting the sleeves are giving me, I think this might be a win. It’s interesting, it’s fun, it’s not any of her tired fallback fashion positions, and most importantly, it doesn’t make her look musty and like a Junior Grandmother In Training nor the Senior Lunatic In Residence.
After I wrote this post, this movie means nothing to me except the word “Mitty,” and I catch myself wishing the terrible, pretentious previews would focus less on Wiig and Stiller and more on the cat. And then I remember that I made up Mitty the Cat and feel this very strange sense of loss.
And then Kristen Wiig gave HGH to a bow tie and sewed it to a cheap dish towel.
This looks like a stylish outfit that rank off to clown college and then flunked out. Her hair seems perturbed to have been dragged into this, and clearly her lips are trying to trick us into thinking they weren’t present for the shenanigans. Now I’m glad Mitty doesn’t exist, because this would depress that poor cat, and feline Prozac is expensive.
Never let it be said that Wiig can’t surprise us:
I never thought she had it in her. Two colors AND some detail AND a bright lipstick? It’s like slept with Roy G. Biv and found it mildly pleasurable. And part of me actually feels affectionately toward this crazy thing, with its hip shroud and its nip darts and its strange drapes-like heaviness; the other part of me wants to teleport her to a simpler time when she can plot to murder someone’s ruling monarch and install her nubile young sister on the throne.
Here’s another one I couldn’t come down on definitively:
Love the bodice, love the shoes, can’t help wondering if the skirt length is stumpifying — and in fact, the skirt itself looks kind of like a mourner’s petticoat, as if it was never supposed to see the light of day, but grief drove her mad, MAD I TELL YOU, and she wandered out of her chambers without reapplying her overskirt. AND FINALLY, I can’t tell if I really want her to wear a dark red lip with this, or if I’m just tired of celebrities wearing ONLY sheer gloss anymore and I’m just pushing against that with all my bloggy might (so, more of a wimpy nudge).