Fugger: January Jones

Fug Men: January Jones


I have been staring at this for fifteen minutes and I can’t… well, I can’t:

Everything she’s wearing is black, and if I’m not mistaken, they are all slightly DIFFERENT depths of black. They are also different depths of hideous. The blazer is mildly whatever, the tunic that might think it’s a dress is problematically terrible, and the pants are hot sliced loaves of no. Does she do this stuff on purpose so that we’ll all talk about how amazing her face is? If so… she’s a genius, because I just did.

[Photo: Getty]

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The Lucky Fugg Conference


Actually, it’s not all fugs in here — although certainly plenty of problems — but I couldn’t resist the title. Also, there appears to have been a fire sale on pink lipstick and white pumps.

[Photos: Getty]

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Fugs and Fabs: The Mad Men Season Seven Premiere Party


In which Christina Hendricks wears a Wes Gordon skirt we all saw on Kim Kardashian recently, and I suggest to January Jones and Elisabeth Moss that Kiernan Shipka is skipping swingy little ninth-grader rings around them.

[Photos: Getty]

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Casual Fuggerday: January Jones


Other than the sleeve length, I DO at least like the coat.

The outfit underneath looks like she’s picking up shifts as a cater-waiter between Mad Men seasons — seriously, if any of that cost more than $20, she should feel robbed. But I guess that’s why the fashion gods invented coats. Warmth, schwarmth; it’s so we can hide on laundry day.

[Photo: Fame/Flynet]

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Fugs and Fabs: The Chloe Los Angeles Fashion Show/Dinner


So many celebrities, so many beige shoes. This event was hosted by January Jones, and basically every woman on Mad Men showed, except for Christina Hendricks. I’ve decided they’re mortal enemies and perhaps to blame for one another’s bad fashion choices throughout time.

[Photos: Getty and Splash]

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Emmy Awards Fug Carpet: January Jones


I don’t feel like January Jones tried very hard with this.

Not that we always love her taste, but January Jones does usually have a consistently edgy point of view. But the only attitude on display here is her implied boredom. There’s nothing fresh or fun about this at all — much like the Emmy telecast in general, actually. If the entire evening had a symbolic dress, this would be it: the appearance of frills, but a drab spirit. The hem looks so stodgy, like it’s a pair of old drapes the likes of which would make Fraulein Maria’s sewing finger twitch with ecstasy. The lack of attempt to style up the drab color with better makeup or creative accessories suggests that her team basically threw up its hands and hoped her genes would be enough for everyone. Indeed, in her interview with Ryan Seacrest, January basically said, “Well, Givenchy made it for me, so I wore it.” What a ringing endorsement. Can I assume they won’t be working together again?

[Photo: Getty]

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