Well. I know that I often say that this slideshow has everything but this slideshow really does have everything: GOATS. LEGOS. CROWNS. CAPES. DAMIAN LEWIS. VERY HIGH FASHION. WOMEN DRESSED AS FLORENCE NIGHTINGALE. PENS. ANGELINA JOLIE. A HARP. Everything! I can’t wait for you to see this insane AMAZING ensemble on Queen Maxima.
In case you missed the rest of this week’s Royal Shenanigans here at GFY, allow me:
- Kate rewore Alexander McQueen at the Buckingham Palace Garden Party this week, but she lost the belt and added a hat that looks a bit like a tortilla pinned to the top of her head. You’re still my girl, Middleton.
- Same day, Kate ALSO wore this crisp nautical number to go stand next to trophies and chat with very hot sailors and also Simon Le Bon. That’s two Le Bon sightings in one week. We might be heading into a Le Bonnaissance.
- William and Becks hung out and talked about their blue suits and the brown-haired ladies they’re married to. I assume. Also endangered species.
- I Wanna Marry “Harry” moved Heather to new heights of capsy rage, to wit: “The show is ROUTINELY THE WORST AT EVERYTHING. TOWER BRIDGE. IT’S TOWER BRIDGE. IT’S THE BRIDGE BY THE TOWER OF LONDON. AT TOWER HILL. RIGHT BY TOWER HILL TUBE STOP IT’S SUPER FAMOUS. TOWER BRIDGE. And even if that’s an easy mistake to make for people who are not familiar with London, when you SET YOUR SHOW there and you FLY OVER IT and your whole premise is whether this yobbo is convincing anyone he’s royalty, DO YOUR HOMEWORK.”
- As a programming note, Trooping The Color (which is the official celebration of QE2′s b-day, because when you are Queen, you can have your birthday whenever you want to) is Saturday, and I will be home working all weekend ANYWAY, so check back then; we should get the whole group. (George is apparently a game-time decision; all the royals reporters seem to think that we probably WON’T see him, but that it isn’t impossible. My guess is, they’re nervous he’s going to launch himself off the balcony.)
And around the rest of the internet, there’s much to discuss:
- This is a good wrap-up of What We Know about this whole Spanish Abdication Situation. It’s interesting, and I can see how people are sort of wondering if the Spanish monarchy is on the way out; after all, Juan Carlos was the King with whom the monarchy was restored (post-Franco), so it’s not quite like this is a well-entrenched state of affairs in modern Spain, if I understand it all correctly, which I may not. Also interesting: “The King will lose the legal immunity he enjoyed as sovereign. This could have interesting implications; a couple of paternity lawsuits were dismissed a few years ago because of his immunity.” SCANDALOUS. (Royal Order of Sartorial Splendor)
- Juan Carlos is SAYING he’s abdicating because he doesn’t want Felipe to “wither waiting like Prince Charles,” like, I think also you had a lot of other problems as mentioned above BUT ALSO BURN. That quote got out because he wanted it to, and it’s TOTALLY BITCHY of him, y’all. Are you still touchy about the Armada, JC? ZING HISTORY JOKE. (The Telegraph)
- Royal Order of Sartorial Splendor also has a good look at the Royal Christening in Sweden this week, for all your Swedish Baby Needs. (She is CUTE.)
- This week’s Hot Yachter has offered to give Prince George sailing lessons and apparently Kate was like, “that is a GREAT IDEA but let’s wait until he can swim, okay?” (The Express)
- Milliner Jane Taylor — who’s made some FABULOUS HATS — talks to Hello! about nuclear fusion. By which I mean hats, and Royal Ascot. She has a LOT of helpful hat tips; there’s also a funny moment where she says that she made loads of a hat that Kate wore “for the Americans.” That does sound like us.
- Cressida has brought out the sideboob. To me, the best part of this whole thing is the expression on the face of the man to whom she is speaking in one of the photos. It’s like, “DO NOT LOOK AT THE SIDEBOOB. DO NOT.” The Express seems to think she and Harry MIGHT get back together, but Katie Nicholl at VF says she thinks it’s well dunzo and I tend to believe her on this one, if only because Cressida has taken some movie role recently and seems to really be Getting On With It. (As well she should.)
- Harry’s in Chile and Brazil this month — WHAT A COINCIDENCE, DURING THE WORLD CUP – and Vanity Fair has the details. VF also claims Harry’s sked is “too packed” for him to get into trouble (AKA into the pants of some lovely Brazilian and Chilean ladies), and that’s so nice of them to pretend that’s true.
- Royals Central suspects that Princess Beatrice is trying to move into being a “full-time working royal,” which is VERY interesting considering the convo we had earlier this week about how Chaz is rumored to want to block the royals who aren’t in his family being able to make a career out of it, once he’s in charge. As you guys know, I’ve noticed over the past month or so that Beatrice has been doing more events, and she’s doing a whole tour of the Isle of Wight next week, so I have suspected that something like this was percolating, but they go into considerably more detail.
- Toblerone made a twelve foot chocolate portrait of George and Wills because people love portraits made of food. Also for PR. Which I guess I just gave them, but I AM a person who loves portraits made of food and who doesn’t enjoy a Toblerone? (People)
[Photos: Getty, Fame/Flynet, Pacific Coast News, Splash, PA Wire]