Fugger: Berenice Bejo

Golden Globes Fug Carpet: Berenice Bejo

The easy version of this entry is, “Did no one tell her the Rose Parade happened two weeks ago?”

But I prefer the unforgivable pun: “What in carnation is she wearing?!?”

[Photo: Getty]

Fug The Trouser-Based Outfits

They just kept popping up, so I decided to put them all together in a little slideshow ode to Please Stop Trying To Ruin Pants Because We Need Other Starlets To Wear Them.

[Photos: WENN]


DGA Awards: Assorted Fugs and Fabs

This feels like the show where everyone takes a break, because the BAFTAs and the Oscars are on the horizon and nobody wants to blow their stash.

[Photos: Getty]


Cannes Fugs and Fabs: Actresses at amfAR

Cannes is long. Doesn’t it feel like it’s been going on forever? And some of these people — Diane Kruger, especially — have been there the whole time. I imagine them arriving all coolly fabulous, swanning into a room at the Majestic Barriere, or wherever, with a swingy travel coat and giant dark shades they rip off as uniformed bellmen scramble to unload all their posh trunks into an appropriate corner of the suite. That may be because I always imagine everyone is posher and more coordinated than I am, as my entrance would look a lot more like Janet The Soap Queen from Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, where she essentially trips into the hotel. Anyway. Let’s look at the latest stuff they unpacked.

[Photos: Getty, WENN]


Berenfug Bejo

Oh, dear me. No.

This looks like an ornamental vase that the Queen got for a wedding gift and then stashed in the Buck House basement, or in a really remote powder room that nobody uses except when really distasteful distant relatives are in town. It’s terrible, it’s droopy, it’s a catastrophic mish-mash of ideas and styles. And it is dragging her boobs down like gravity’s demon servant. Forger Mercury; her entire solar system must be in retrograde.

[Photo: Getty]


Oscars Fug Carpet: Berenice Bejo

Oh, madame:

You are so much prettier than this. Is this punishment because we keep yapping about how much we love a redhead in green? It is, isn’t it? I’m so sorry. I never meant to do this to you.