Fug File: Who Fugged It More

Fug/Fab Face-Off: Shailene Woodley vs. Diane Lane


Last awards season, only about a month shy in the proceedings of where we are now actually, Shailene Woodley wore this lacy dress in support of The Descendants. Fug Nation was split — 56 percent of you loved it, and the rest felt either negatively or ambivalent, saying she looked too mother-of-the-bride or that it didn’t belong on anyone under 35. So let’s see how it flies with you on Diane Lane — who is over 35, could therefore be the mother of a bride, and if you think about it, kind of looks like a grown-up Shailene Woodley.

I wonder if the fact that Shailene’s hair covered the camisole strap part of the dress is a reason I’m liking the bodice part better on her. I also think the length is more ideal on Shailene, but somehow I can see the waist detail a bit clearer on the photo of Diane and it seems more flattering there. But either way, the whole concept does still scream “wedding,” with its combination of lace and satiny slip — on Shailene it’s the bridesmaid dress she’ll never wear again, and on Diane, she KIND OF looks like the Mother of the Bride had this on under her actual dress, trapped a groomsman in the coat room, and has begun a seduction. All of which is to say that I can’t quite find my way around this dress on Diane any more than I could on Shailene, except to say that to my surprise — even though it’s not a typically “young” dress — I might prefer it on the whippersnapper. No affront to Diane Lane intended. She’s older than I am, but if I woke up tomorrow and looked exactly like her, I would be so stoked that even the Mars Rover would look up from its crater and be like, “Huh, that was loud.”

PIck one (vis a vis the dress, not for life purposes):

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[Photo: Getty]

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AMAs Fug/Fab Face-Off: Nicki Minaj In A Threesome


First, Paula Patton wore it in a softer yellow, and we thought it was adequate but boring (and side by side, it almost looks like she had it tailored to be MORE dull); Julie Bowen picked it in what looks like a kickier chartreuse, and we liked it better. Now Nicki Minaj has picked up the Lhuillier:

Crazy that this crispy wig still looks better than Bowen’s hair did. I actually think this is the most fun on Nicki — she is being appropriately restrained with everything, yet still works it with enough whimsy that the whole thing has the right attitude about it. But mostly, I think it’s hilarious to imagine Julie Bowen and Nicki Minaj having any items in their closets in common — or better, sharing clothes. I cherish the idea of Julie calling up Nicki and being like, “Dude, I’ll give you my tulle garrote if you’ll spot me your Pope for date night.”

Pick your favorite (in the ensemble, not generally):

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Oh, and also:

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Who Fugged It More: Ashley Greene vs Dakota Johnson


No, you’re not seeing things. We JUST fugged Kristen Stewart in the Liza Minnelli version of this outfit, and now we’ve got two more ladies offering a variation. Can we cut it out with the lace for a while? It’s getting chilly. Let’s all eat carbohydrates and refined sugars and prepare for the Mayan apocalypse, instead of trying to look like a madam’s light fixtures.

Which one is hardest to stomach?

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[Photos: Getty, Fame/Flynet]

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Fug/Fab Face-Off: Amber Heard vs. Ginnifer Goodwin


If I hadn’t stuck her name in the headline, I might’ve tried to trick you into thinking that was Kristen Stewart. It’s uncanny, no? If Amber Heard’s acting career doesn’t work out on its own, maybe she should try to hitch a ride on the Stewart Express somewhere. Imagine a straight-to-DVD Twilight 5: Breaking Brunch Time. Or Panic Room 2: Oops, We Left Her In There. Sold. Anyway, clearly — based on the slides — I have definite feelings about who won this, and that it wasn’t even really a contest. But I do love a poll, so…

Who pulled off the neck fan best?

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[Photos: Getty]

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Who Fugged ‘Em More: Elisabeth Moss vs. January Jones


The first news is that Elisabeth Moss has scrapped the blonde.

I actually miss it, although I suspect it’s because Peggy Olsen has not yet discovered peroxide. But maybe what’s holding her back here, for me, is the fact that her makeup seems to belong with a totally different outfit. As do her shorts, which are so nondescript and tiresome. She’s, like, jazz hands on the top and gym rat on the bottom. I wish I could’ve seen the blazer and bright shirt with a skinny pant, or stylized tuxedo trouser. But if she had her heart set on formal shorts, I think she needed more interesting shoes with them. You need to SELL those suckers. To put this in terms Peggy would appreciate, those shorts are baked beans. You need to trick people into thinking they’re a delicious idea.

January Jones also went with formal shorts:

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Who Fugged It More? Jada Pinkett Smith v. Kristen Wiig


Remember this?

Jada Pinkett Smith does. AND LOOK WHAT SHE DID WITH IT:

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