Fug File: Who Fugged It More

Oscars Who Fabbed It More: Charlize Theron


Who knew that Charlize and Miley Cyrus looked so much alike? (Or, more accurately, as I said to Heather last night, who knew that Miley’s FACE was so good? She needs to never lose that haircut.) I also agree that Charlize’s super short crop (she buzzed her head for a movie role) is crazy flattering on her — in part because her face is crazy flattering on her:

As for her dress….well, check it out:

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BAFTAs Who Fugged It More: Amy Adams or Alice Eve


I’m a little afraid of this dress.

It makes me think of the Headless Horseman. Like, her torso is a spindly wood after dark, and someone is going to ride through it with his decapitated head on a saddle just to freak out some weary travelers with the mess and pernicious smell. And, relatedly, the dress also makes me think of creeping rot. All of these are words a lady dreams of having written underneath her picture someday.

Alice’s dress is less elaborate:

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Fug/Fab Face-Off: Shailene Woodley vs. Diane Lane


Last awards season, only about a month shy in the proceedings of where we are now actually, Shailene Woodley wore this lacy dress in support of The Descendants. Fug Nation was split — 56 percent of you loved it, and the rest felt either negatively or ambivalent, saying she looked too mother-of-the-bride or that it didn’t belong on anyone under 35. So let’s see how it flies with you on Diane Lane — who is over 35, could therefore be the mother of a bride, and if you think about it, kind of looks like a grown-up Shailene Woodley.

I wonder if the fact that Shailene’s hair covered the camisole strap part of the dress is a reason I’m liking the bodice part better on her. I also think the length is more ideal on Shailene, but somehow I can see the waist detail a bit clearer on the photo of Diane and it seems more flattering there. But either way, the whole concept does still scream “wedding,” with its combination of lace and satiny slip — on Shailene it’s the bridesmaid dress she’ll never wear again, and on Diane, she KIND OF looks like the Mother of the Bride had this on under her actual dress, trapped a groomsman in the coat room, and has begun a seduction. All of which is to say that I can’t quite find my way around this dress on Diane any more than I could on Shailene, except to say that to my surprise — even though it’s not a typically “young” dress — I might prefer it on the whippersnapper. No affront to Diane Lane intended. She’s older than I am, but if I woke up tomorrow and looked exactly like her, I would be so stoked that even the Mars Rover would look up from its crater and be like, “Huh, that was loud.”

PIck one (vis a vis the dress, not for life purposes):

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[Photo: Getty]

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AMAs Fug/Fab Face-Off: Nicki Minaj In A Threesome


First, Paula Patton wore it in a softer yellow, and we thought it was adequate but boring (and side by side, it almost looks like she had it tailored to be MORE dull); Julie Bowen picked it in what looks like a kickier chartreuse, and we liked it better. Now Nicki Minaj has picked up the Lhuillier:

Crazy that this crispy wig still looks better than Bowen’s hair did. I actually think this is the most fun on Nicki — she is being appropriately restrained with everything, yet still works it with enough whimsy that the whole thing has the right attitude about it. But mostly, I think it’s hilarious to imagine Julie Bowen and Nicki Minaj having any items in their closets in common — or better, sharing clothes. I cherish the idea of Julie calling up Nicki and being like, “Dude, I’ll give you my tulle garrote if you’ll spot me your Pope for date night.”

Pick your favorite (in the ensemble, not generally):

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Oh, and also:

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Who Fugged It More: Ashley Greene vs Dakota Johnson


No, you’re not seeing things. We JUST fugged Kristen Stewart in the Liza Minnelli version of this outfit, and now we’ve got two more ladies offering a variation. Can we cut it out with the lace for a while? It’s getting chilly. Let’s all eat carbohydrates and refined sugars and prepare for the Mayan apocalypse, instead of trying to look like a madam’s light fixtures.

Which one is hardest to stomach?

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[Photos: Getty, Fame/Flynet]

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Fug/Fab Face-Off: Amber Heard vs. Ginnifer Goodwin


If I hadn’t stuck her name in the headline, I might’ve tried to trick you into thinking that was Kristen Stewart. It’s uncanny, no? If Amber Heard’s acting career doesn’t work out on its own, maybe she should try to hitch a ride on the Stewart Express somewhere. Imagine a straight-to-DVD Twilight 5: Breaking Brunch Time. Or Panic Room 2: Oops, We Left Her In There. Sold. Anyway, clearly — based on the slides — I have definite feelings about who won this, and that it wasn’t even really a contest. But I do love a poll, so…

Who pulled off the neck fan best?

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[Photos: Getty]

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