I want to love this. From the waist down, it’s totally serviceable:
Like, that lower half just had a really nice day at the Country Club, and is sad summer is almost over, but also wants to get the hell out of there before the dipshit in the blouse with the synthesizer starts performing.
The top part, though… I feel like the whole Sternum Knot thing should be in the back somehow. Because it’s doing terribly unflattering things to her chest from the front — like, fairly graphic things — and it’s even worse when shot from the side. I couldn’t bring myself to use the close-up photo I HAVE from that angle, but suffice to say, you can see STRAIGHT into the keyhole — it’s gapping — and it’s a clear view of 80 percent of her breast, at a premiere for a movie based on a young adult novel. It’s… not great, Bob, any which way you slice it, because it just looks like something nobody took into account. Show your cleav if you want — I have NO problem with cleav, real boobs, etc. — but sideboob/underboob combos are never as sexy as anyone wants them to be, ESPECIALLY when they are accidental. Maybe Boob Wrangler as a career really IS the new frontier, but frankly, I feel like it should be included in a stylist’s job description.