Fug File: Freaky Fug Friday

Freaky Fug Friday: Kym Johnson


Kym Johnson here is on Dancing With the Stars, so she’s obviously comfortable with her abs:

I fear she also just fell out of a time machine coming from that one crazy summer she spent working at the Wet Seal by the Sbarro’s back in 1989.

THE TASK:  Imagine that you wrote a movie starring this girl, who spent one crazy summer working at the Wet Seal by the Sbarro’s back in 1989. TELL US THAT MOVIE’S TITLE.

THE RULES: All entries must be posted in the comments of this post by 9 p.m. Pacific time on MONDAY.

THE PRIZE:  Speaking of summer, we are delighted to be giving away two copies of Joanna Philbin’s new book Rules of Summer. Per Amazon: “There are two sides to every summer. When seventeen-year-old Rory McShane steps off the bus in East Hampton, it’s as if she’s entered another universe, one populated by impossibly beautiful people wearing pressed khakis and driving expensive cars. She’s signed on to be a summer errand girl for the Rules — a wealthy family with an enormous beachfront mansion. Upon arrival, she’s warned by other staff members to avoid socializing with the family, but Rory soon learns that may be easier said than done.

Stifled by her friends and her family’s country club scene, seventeen-year-old Isabel Rule, the youngest of the family, embarks on a breathless romance with a guy whom her parents would never approve of. It’s the summer for taking chances, and Isabel is bringing Rory along for the ride. But will Rory’s own summer romance jeopardize her friendship with Isabel? And, after long-hidden family secrets surface, will the Rules’ picture-perfect world ever be the same?”

Who doesn’t love a juicy summer beach book, right? Having read this one, I can tell you that it’s totally a delight — you WILL sit by the pool and devour it. We have two copies (for US and Canadian readers only), so get cracking!

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Freaky Fug Friday: The Winners!


Thanks to all who entered for being patient while we covered the Met Gala. And congrats to our winners!

A reminder:

THE TASK:  Please name (by which I mean, invent creatively!) the 70s soft-rock band which Aubrey clearly believes herself to be fronting, judging from this ensemble.

THE WINNERS:

Sarah B
Dr. Aubrey O’Day’s 100% Natural Good Time Family Band Solution

MollySC
The Farrah Fawcett Memorial Tabernacle Choir.

cath
Polly, Esther and Skye.
Several years later, she’d shorten the skirt, add some pleated drainpipes, tease up the hair, and become the lead keytarist of new wave sensation, The Permanent Press!

Stellagrace
Tab Cola and the Summer’s Eve Band

C Eller
Skeevy Knits, member of Pleatwood Smack

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Freaky Fug Friday: Aubrey O’Day


I’m so glad that former Fug Madness Champion Aubrey O’Day has not totally faded quietly into the good night, but continues to occasionally pop up dressed like she just fell out of a wormhole from the 70s. I’m so glad that I’m going to do a giveaway!

THE TASK:  Please name (by which I mean, invent creatively!) the 70s soft-rock band which Aubrey clearly believes herself to be fronting, judging from this ensemble.

THE RULES: All entries must be posted in the comments of this post by 9 p.m. Pacific time on MONDAY.

THE PRIZE: We are thrilled to be giving away five copies of Siege and Storm, the sequel to the best-selling Shadow and Bone, by Leigh Bardugo, along with Siege and Storm nailpolish! Per Amazon: “Hunted across the True Sea, haunted by the lives she took on the Fold, Alina must try to make a life with Mal in an unfamiliar land, all while keeping her identity as the Sun Summoner a secret. But she can’t outrun her past or her destiny for long.

The Darkling has emerged from the Shadow Fold with a terrifying new power and a dangerous plan that will test the very boundaries of the natural world. With the help of a notorious privateer, Alina returns to the country she abandoned, determined to fight the forces gathering against Ravka. But as her power grows, Alina slips deeper into the Darkling’s game of forbidden magic, and farther away from Mal. Somehow, she will have to choose between her country, her power, and the love she always thought would guide her–or risk losing everything to the oncoming storm.”

That sounds like a great read — I haven’t read it yet either, but I loved the first book and I can’t wait to read this one as well. This contest is open to US and Canadian residents. Get to writing!

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Freaky Fug Friday: The Results


This week’s entries were great! Behold the winners of Bobbie Thomas’s great new book, The Power of Style:

THE TASK:  Please write The Benediction Of Johnny Depp, AKA the blessing he’s giving his fans in this picture.

THE WINNERS:

Rowynn:
Tim Burton, who art in London,
Hallowed be thy name.
Thy creative visions come,
Thy directorial will be done.
In Wonderland as it is in Collinwood.
Give us this day our Scissorhands,
And lead us not into Gene Wilder’s Chocolate Factory.
But deliver us from pirate movies.
For thine is the craziness, and the eccentricity that makes an Indian wear an entire stuffed crow on his head,
And the awesomely wacky wife, forever and ever. Amen

Ceece:
Give me your faded, your torn,
your disheveled masses yearning to wear scarves,
The layered refuse of your laundry bin,
Send these, the shapeless, wrinkled clothes to me.

With, you know, all apologies to Emma Lazarus.
Karen G:
Blessed be the funky,
Cause these clothes be smellin’ skunky.
Blessed be the befedora’d,
And all the other hats I’ve adored.
Blessed be the torn & stained
Shirts & jeans that I have maimed.

In the name of the Moss and the Paradis
And the Wino Forever,

Amen

Hallie:
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of junkets, I will fear no evil: for my accessories are with me; my fedora and my necklaces and my bandanas and my glasses, they comfort me. I wear them all the days of my life.

Samantha:
May your fedora rise to meet you.
May the scarf be ever in your pocket.
May your chains reflect warmth upon your face
and eyeliner and man-scara fall dark around your eyes.
Until we meet again
May faux-filth keep you in the grime of its grasp.
Amen.

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Freaky Fug Friday: Johnny Depp


I’m so excited about this week’s giveaway. And also really excited for all of you to see what Johnny Depp is up to:

I am pretty sure he thinks he’s Indiana Jones now? At any rate, he’s clearly happy to be giving the crowd here his blessing.

THE TASK:  Please write The Benediction Of Johnny Depp, AKA the blessing he’s giving his fans in this picture.

THE RULES: All entries must be posted in the comments of this post by 9 p.m. Pacific time on MONDAY.

THE PRIZE:  This week, we are happy to be giving away five (5) copies of the new book The Power of Style: Everything You Need to Know Before Getting Dressed Tomorrow, by TODAY show style editor Bobbie Thomas. I have read the book, and I have to say, I think it’s really great. There are A LOT of style guides out there, but this one is sincerely helpful, and it went way beyond the old “everyone needs a white shirt/take your pants to a tailor!” advice we all already know and into actually really useful information. I think you will all seriously enjoy it.

From Amazon: “Beyond understanding your best colors and figure-flattering clothes, Bobbie takes a unique step back in this inspiring guide to empower you to feel stylish, smart, sexy, and satisfied—with a look that’s uniquely your own…

You can’t live life naked, so after you brush your teeth in the morning, you put “something” on. It’s the first decision of your day, but have you ever considered that it’s also one of the most important? Style goes far beyond fashion and beauty and is a powerful way to say who we are and get what we want. Your “style speak” comes through in a louder “voice” than anything you might scream from a rooftop. But often, there is so much focus on the outside that we forget to step back and understand that style really starts inside.

From your love life to your career, and the less obvious moments in between, the way people see you will filter your opportunities. Ultimately, what they see is what you get. In part I of this must-have style guide, Bobbie Thomas will help you identify what you’d like others to see and boost your confidence, and in part II , she’ll show you how to find your best colors and cuts, edit your closet, and more, so you can build a better, more useful wardrobe.”

This contest is open to US residents only.

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Freaky Fug Friday: The Results!


Big congrats to the lucky winners of Aaron Hartzler’s great new book Rapture Practice! Behold:

THE TASK:  Help. Please explain what Lilo is actually wearing here. But do it in a haiku.

THE WINNERS:

C Eller:
Misheard my advice
“Get thee to a tannery”
Was not the intent

Slogr:
The answer is clear:
Dominatrix, Nevernude
LiLo papped at work.

foo:
Charlie Sheen’s new couch
Met a worse fate than the dress
After the clubbing

B Marie:
Years of hard living
Bring about leather-like skin
Here, literally

Kate:
A tragedy strikes!
Lindsay finds snakes on a plane,
Legs chomped foot to thigh

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